Bastards
- Dan Watkins: Role - Bass guitar, driver, stoic
- Biff Roxby: Role - Trombone, driver, security
- Louis Barabbas: Role - Vocals, rhythm guitar, dog impressions, pun-maker
- Matthew Cleghorn: Role - Lead guitar, accounts, eye-roller
- Tom Cleghorn: Role - Drums, quote archive, butt of jokes
- Fran Lydiatt: Role - Piano, fact-of-the-day, questions
